Men's Grooming: Hair, Beards & Styling

[Fugue]

Hello Everyone,

I am not a member of many websites and when my application to tFS was accepted I was quite surprised. I feel quite intimidated by tFS and the community as I normally am well versed in the matter at hand. I find it hard to talk about fashion the way people do here.

I have a problem I wondered if you could help me with...

I've always had my hair slightly longer than what one would consider average since the age of 14 I'd say. At around the age of 18 I began to get it cut shorter and as of last month I had an undercut that I wore back "short" formally almost. For personal reasons the hair had to come off. So it was shaved and I was bald; That was two weeks ago...

How does one go about growing one's hair in properly? I see this is a chance to undo all the damage I had done before with the blowdryer and GHDs. So I want to do right by my hair and right past wrongs. Should I get it cut often? I know this won't make it grow faster (it's growing fast enough) but I won't to avoid split ends etc. Any advice on a style would be greatly appreciated as I've been told to leave it short by a lot of people but on the other-hand I've been had people tell me they miss my longer hair and now I'm not sure what to do as there are good sides to both.

My second dilemma is that people react so differently to me shorter hair. I've also just lost a close friend so I've had some time off work and I had let my facial hair go unchecked (I'm normally clean shaven and wet shave every morning). The beard thing if you can call it a beard is very popular. I know beards are the in thing right now apparently (I think?) but the reaction is quite startling.

In the end it will come down to what I like I know that. However I'm not an overly outgoing person and I like to hear the opinions of others before I make a big dissension like this and for me this is a big decision

I'm also interested in your opinions on the hair vs shaven/clean=shaven vs. beard thing from a sociological point of view of.

I can provide more personal info if helps, thank you very much for reading.

F.

 

[Phuel]

Without knowing much about your current hair length and type, I would recommend to have your hair trimmed every few weeks to maintain the style you're trying to grow into. I good hairstylist would be a good investment. Just remind the hairstylist to not get scissor-happy and trim too much off, especially the top.

If you'd rather just let your hair grow in naturally without a hairstylist's help, keep your hair in control by using a product rather than just let it be wild and free. So many guys with longer, unruly hair can instantly look so much better if they just learn to take five minutes to style their hair.

Same with the beard. Keep it trimmed so that it doesn't overwhelm your face.

I have very thick hair and at one time I kept my hair longer-- at chin length. My hair is wavy at that length and I had to keep it down with products-- just five minutes in the morning slicked back and that was it. I also had a beard until just a couple of years ago and I kept it trimmed closed to my face, otherwise I'd be mistaken for a hobo.

 

[BetteT]

Welcome to the Fashion Spot, Fugue! It's actually a pretty friendly place around here ... so no need to be intimidated.

Secondly ... I am going to move this post to the "Hair Care" forums ... just a better place to discuss this topic. And I'm going to change the title a bit, to focus on men's hair.

And I agree ... keeping it trimmed neatly will make the growing out process easier ... and you will not look like you just rolled out of bed. (unless that's the look you are going for ... some guys like a rough look.)

Beards ... now that's another thing altogether. I would say the beards have always represented rebellion, toughness and masculinity. They go in and out of style all the time. A lot of young men experiment with them ... it's almost as a rite of passage.

As to how others feel about them ... that's very subjective ... some people love them, some hate them. But you are right ... that people who do not know you will judge you by how you look. So you have to sort of figure out how you want to present yourself to strangers.

 

[BetteT]

Note: I also pinned the thread. It's a great topic and I think we need to bring more talk about men's grooming to this forum ... so this way the thread is always near the top.

 

[CommanderTMugler]

Great Topic!

I'm so over beards, I guess part of me is a bit jealous since I can't grow one and would like to experiment with it a bit but alas no, even my cat has more whiskers than me.

As far as hair, I've tried growing it out by myself but I have so much of it and it's so thick that it's hard to manage when it gets longer. I don't want to spend 20 minutes in the morning styling it much and using a blow drier and what not. Just to save time I'll just have it short and neat. Since I don't have a beard I don't really spend too much time grooming, just go get a decent haircut every 2 or so weeks and in the morning use a bit of product just to keep it a bit neat and decent for work.

It would be nice to grow it out and try something new but I'm too impatient by myself. I would need somebody, a decent hairstylist that would kind of guide me through, they would know what to do better and be a bit of support. Ideally I'd want hair like Jon Kortajarena, one can dream right?

 

[Benn98]

I think in all my adult life I've only grown my hair out once. And I didn't like the end result because it was too high-maintenance, so reverted back to my usual pompadour cut. I'm about to change that as well, just feel like a clone looking like each and every guy on the street.
Also, the British weather isn't very kind to long hair. Half of the guys I come across always look like wet dogs, and it's becoming so common that I suppose it's a movement now.

I'll echo Phuel's sentiments, trimming every few weeks or so would accelerate growth. But really, not more than a few mm's. You'll want to look into proper nutrition as well. A lot of people neglect to think about this when they grow out. Incorporating Omega 3 rich sources and maybe avocadoes are a good start.

Beards I personally wouldn't consider. At a stretch I can deal with a trimmed beard or stubble, but long beard especially paired with long hair? God, no! A lot of guys do not bear their face shape in mind, and that too is important.

 

[Phuel]

^^^ Thanks for resurrecting this thread, Benn.

… I wonder what happened to the OP…? Did he not like the responding posts? LOL

Seeing almost every guy-- gay and straight, sport a beard currently made me shave off mine 2 years ago.

Some guys do look amazing with a beard-- especially blond guys. And most guys do look better with some stubbles-- it just gives a structure to a face. But when you're at the gaybourhood and 9.5 out of 10 men there have the prerequisite beard and buzzed-hair style, it's like a fcuking clone factory and you just don't want to be another clone.

When I did have a beard, my boyfriend at the time also decided to grow one. But it took him a month, and he could only grow fine, wispy hair which made him look unkept and kind of grungy. I loved it and thought he looked like a hot stoner-- like a better-looking Jarrod Scott. But his agency didn't like it and asked him to shave it all off, sadly.

Back when I grew out my hair to chin-length, it was at buzzed-length, probably a quarter of an inch. I wore a cap/ beanie/ hat for several weeks until it was at a length that didn't have my head looking like a hedgehog. That's what I'd suggest to any guy that's growing their hair out if they don't want to have it maintained by a hairstylist: Wear a hat until you're able to do something with the length.

 

[Ianastar]

Ive had a beard/scruff for several years, but think I am going to shave it off and see how it feels/looks. Also, Ive had the under-cut hairstyle for some time now and changing it up since it seems that now, its the go to hairstyle for almost every guy and hipster.

I am growing it out to a medium length similar to Brad Pitt's in "Seven Years in Tibet" or Johnny Depp's in the Dior Sauvage ad. I got to grow out the part I have underneath that is shaved to blend into the top. If it looks horrible Ill be going back to short hair. But feeling the need to try something different and that not every guy has right now.

 

[bomurzynski]

To maintain a certain style, you must go systematically to the same barber. If you don't know what style is best for you, your barber can definitely come up with a personalized style for you. I've been getting my hair cut by the same barber for 25 years. In all that time, he and I have really become friends.

 

[Gormonioss]

To maintain a certain style, you must go systematically to the same barber. If you don't know what style is best for you, your barber can definitely come up with a personalized style for you. I've been getting my hair cut by the same barber for 25 years. In all that time, he and I have really become friends. When I practically lost all my hair, my barber advised me to go to novahairtransplantnyc.com, and for a good reason. These guys saved me as there was almost no hair left on my head, and I didn't want to be bald.

 

[eugenius]

I was really hoping that once we menfolk emerged from our COVID-induced hibernations, we'd want to finally get rid of our beards...like, "I'm tired of looking too comfortable." But sadly, this Castaway-realness trend is not gonna die soon.

That hairstyle where it's shorter on the sides and longer on the top, a la ABC News Foreign Correspondent James Longman, I don't mind. Even though it's rather common these days, it looks good on every guy, so I'm a fan.

I'll have to say No to blond guys w/ beards, though. They almost always wind up w/ a flesh-colored beard, which looks creepy, IMO...See Exhibit A:


(src: nydailynews)

 

[Benn98]

^Not happening. If anything, I predict we'll see even more beards moving forward. One, because beards are once again a marker of masculinity (and despite what Tik Tok and silly culture wars are trying to tell you) which is actually becoming more pronounced by the day. Another reason is the beard care market which is now so massive that corporations will do what they can to get guys to buy growing & grooming kits. Basically what Gilette and all the others did 40 years ago.

 

[eugenius]

When I look @ all the beard-care crap out there, I'm like "What is all this?" Beard balm. Beard oil. Beard thickener. Beard growth kits. Seemingly every skin/hair care brand has a line of beard products nowadays.

All this fussing w/ our beards, yet we can't solve common, everyday dandruff.

(PS: welcome back!)

 

[KoV]

Last year I lost almost all of my hair (and shaved down what little remained so as to not look like a crazy person). When it started to grow back, it was patchy, some areas were coming in fully, some thinly, and others remained completely smooth and hairless. I was extremely nervous about it never return fully or evenly. Anyways, I got one of those scalp massagers back in January, the kind you use when washing your hair, and it truly seems like a miracle product. All of the areas that previously weren't growing back began to do so within about a week of using it, and lots of new baby hairs started coming in to thicken out areas already growing back. It's possible that growth would've happened on its own, but it doesn't seem coincidental that it started happening so soon after I incorporated that into my routine. My hair looks kind of crazy and uneven right now while I continue to grow it out a bit, but I feel a million times better about the whole thing. My balding was medically induced, but I wonder if people fighting receding hairlines or bald spots would benefit from using the same thing. Tempted to have one sent to Prince William's address.

 

[Benn98]

Last year I lost almost all of my hair (and shaved down what little remained so as to not look like a crazy person). When it started to grow back, it was patchy, some areas were coming in fully, some thinly, and others remained completely smooth and hairless. I was extremely nervous about it never return fully or evenly. Anyways, I got one of those scalp massagers back in January, the kind you use when washing your hair, and it truly seems like a miracle product. All of the areas that previously weren't growing back began to do so within about a week of using it, and lots of new baby hairs started coming in to thicken out areas already growing back. It's possible that growth would've happened on its own, but it doesn't seem coincidental that it started happening so soon after I incorporated that into my routine. My hair looks kind of crazy and uneven right now while I continue to grow it out a bit, but I feel a million times better about the whole thing. My balding was medically induced, but I wonder if people fighting receding hairlines or bald spots would benefit from using the same thing. Tempted to have one sent to Prince William's address.

Very strange that Prince William was the first bald man you thought of when in reality bald men are universal.
I suspect you have a crush on him.

But jokes aside I've heard that massagers stimulate hair growth but I don't think the science behind it is consistent.
I thank heavens each day that I have my full hairline and head of hair intact. It's actually a big deal for a lot of men.

 

[KoV]

Very strange that Prince William was the first bald man you thought of when in reality bald men are universal.
I suspect you have a crush on him.

But jokes aside I've heard that massagers stimulate hair growth but I don't think the science behind it is consistent.
I thank heavens each day that I have my full hairline and head of hair intact. It's actually a big deal for a lot of men.

Oh I absolutely do/did have a crush on him, but I think almost everyone can agree he looked really gorgeous with a full head of hair and now a little less so.